15. Don’t wait in ambush; don’t bring things to a painful point; don’t try to be the fastest.

Here’s another triptych of pointers to our habitual way of relating with others: we wait until the time is right to attack, keep going in a conflict until it hurts and always compete and try to outdo others. The path of courage and compassion, however, is to open my heart and relate directly with each situation in the moment. This allows me to let go of the “us and them” story and make friends with my own suffering and that of others without creating a competition. The path is not a race and there is no prize at the “end.”