13. Don’t wallow in self-pity; don’t be jealous; don’t be frivolous.
These three slogans all point to the same thing. Whatever I do, whether it’s wallowing in self-pity, being overwhelmed with jealousy or frivolously wasting my time, once I begin to see that I’m doing it and recognize that it’s a habitual pattern, then I am capable of doing something about it. I can begin by getting to know the uncomfortable feelings under the story line as a basis for trying something different.
NOTE: A number of the pithy and potent slogans in this point of mind training begin with the word “don’t.” In general I prefer positive framing, saying what I want to do, rather than negative, saying what I shouldn’t do. However, I have decided to leave these slogans in their original, negative form. I find something compelling about the list of “don’ts” offered in these teachings. I think of them as a list of examples of what to look out for when I’m seeing my habitual patterns and trying to do something different.